Tuesday, May 19, 2009

Birthday presents, cash woes and some FANTASYS thrown in for good measure.......

Muh man’s birthday is rapidly approaching and I need to select an extremely awesome gift for this very special birthday number 55. Double nickels! Something that will say "I love you even when you run off to do your thing while leaving me with a seriously over grown lawn." Without a large outlay of cash, because cash and I don’t have a good relationship. Cash NEVER stands by me through thick and thin, it comes and goes, usually more of the goes.
Why am I always so broke!? Am I the only person you know that earns SIX figures and complains of money woes? That’s right peeps, I’m coming clean, my annual income is SIX figures. $1,040.00. One, two, three, four, decimal point, five, six. Unfortunately champagne wishes and caviar dreams don't come true unless the six digits are ALL to the left of that itty bitty ever important decimal point. Hrmphhh, how trivial.
Hmm, what's this in my inbox?
An offer from my fairy godfather at Eden Fantasys to review another fantabulous sex toy! B-I-N-G-O! The perfect gift solution.

Oh look, it's mailman Steve, at my door already, holding a plain white box with no incriminating return address. Wow, Eden Fantasys isn't kidding when they say fast shipping!
My selection this time.....the Bedside Lover's Tool Kit, because seriously what man doesn't love when it's all about him topped off with a little (or a lot of) hummin the bobo. I was especially excited about the feather duster and honey dust, I had this stuff a million years ago in another galaxy and it was awesome! But yeah, it was a sex toy that I used with my ex husband and I think it may have been one of the many things I told him to shove up his ass when I left. Plus reusing stuff like that in a new relationship, just so not cool.

The kit is tucked neatly into a box that conceals your intimate indulgences easily within your reach. It looks like a little jewelry box that no one would question if displayed on your nightstand. The portions are small, like smaller than sample size small, about 1 ounce of each. Just sayin.
The feather duster, eh, it was ok. Perhaps a small brush or pouf would be better for application. The honey dust was a serious disappointment and not at all as I remembered it. I'd like to take a moment to address the Kama Sutra people, yo, a plastic baggie? WTF? It wasn't even Ziploc, it spilled all over and then some more. This really needs to be in jar like my powdered makeup, with tiny holes on the top, so you can apply sparingly and not end up with 1/2 the bag on your sheets when an overly zealous hubby grabs it at the bottom. It sort of ruins the moment.
The Oil of Love, gently warms when you blow on it and it's not really oil, it's water based and washes off easily, which is a plus. You can use the Oil of Love as a lubricant or a massage oil. This was nice except for the packaging. It's a tiny bottle, with an even teenier tinier difficult to remove cork. Again, spillage. Are ya listening Kama Sutra marketing department?
The edible Vanilla Massage Cream was interesting, not quite as tasty as frosting or Cool Whip, but doable. At last, a container that I was pleased with, a small jar with a screw on top.
Finally, the Love Liquid, who names this stuff? But yeah, the Love Liquid was all that it promised to be, "slippery smooth through the night," packaged in a spill proof tube.
The concept behind this Bedside Lover's Tool Kit is great, it just needs a little fine tuning in my opinion.
Now I'm going to click my heels together and repeat "there's no place like Eden Fantasys, there's no place like Eden Fantasys, there's no place like Eden Fantasys" and maybe my fairy godfather will wave his magic wand (hehe, that made me giggle a little) and offer my readers a giveaway. Hey a girl's gotta have some FANTASYS.
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15 comments:

Jill said...

You are naughty, naughty!

Miz Q said...

Whynot is a lucky 55 year OLD man! ;o) lol

and I can say that cuz we're the same age

Stacie's Madness said...

me love edens!

The Mom Jen said...

Fun stuff, i've got a hook up as well! Enjoy!

Amy Amy Bo Bamey said...

Love Liquid had me giggling! Maybe all the spillage was because the room was so dark LOL I know how you like it LOL

dana said...

OK. Now I'm officially PISSED OFF! I write good ads, telling people how wonderful the Love Bunny is, and Drew says "Thanks. See ya."

I should have kept on bitching about his products so he'd still be sending me stuff.

p.s. use rubber sheets or....ICK!!!

Jennifer Suarez said...

LOL! Love liquid... what a name!

: Wanted to let you know I'm hosting another awesome giveaway on my blog! Click here to enter!

Booklover1212 said...

I soooo enjoyed reading this post! It gave me a much needed giggle this morning!!

~ Jennifer
http://thetoyboxyears.blogspot.com

Tiffany said...

I wonder if they make a redneck kit like that? Hubby would love it if it came beer flavored. LOL

Laura M said...

Heehee Fairy godfather.

Chocolate Covered Daydreams said...

Oh boy! The love kit sounds messy but good. Hope you can think of something fun for whynot. My Boo's birthday is Friday and I'm totally stumped on what to get for him.

Michelle said...

Wow... that's a lot of stuff to put into such a tiny box -- but hey, at least he enjoyed his birthday, right? :)

Kristine said...

Ohhh...you know how much I love Drew and Eden Fantasies! I have another review coming up soon!

Nap Warden said...

Darn that decimal point!

Kathy B! said...

MRM, I wish I coulda seen my mom's face when reading this... why am I so behind with my blog reading?! I would've loved to call her out on this one :)

Eden's Fantasy sounds like it's on the right track...

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