Thursday, June 11, 2009

Hmmm.....Things That Make Me Wonder


Why is it when a sign says 'Wet Paint' you still have to check that it is?

How do painkillers know which pain to treat?

Why are they called stairs inside but steps outside?

I wonder about the person who first discovered you could milk a cow. What did they originally think they were doing to the cow?

Why is it when people gossip about you, no-one comes and asks you if it's true before telling 10 other people?

Why is it when somebody says you can't do something, you instantly want to do just that?

I wonder why I even bother telling my problems to anyone 20% don't care and the other 80% are glad I have them.

Would I be exempt from cleaning the house if I just hung a sign on the front door that said, "Pardon the mess - My my grandson and I are making memories!"

Does anyone wonder what I wonder about?

Which is better chocolate or sex?

Who invented words? How do we know that what we say is actually real?

What do you do when the only person who can stop your crying is the person who makes you cry in the first place?

Do lesbian squirrels still eat nuts?

Have any of the dollar bills in my wallet ever been in a stripper's butt crack?

What do Bert and Ernie do for a living?

Would anyone even notice if I just disappeared?

Exactly where the hell IS Easy Street?

Leave me a comment and tell me what it is you wonder about.



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25 comments:

Julie said...

"Do lesbian squirrels still eat nuts?"

OMG, I just spit coffee all over my monitor.

Mrs. Schmitty said...

The cow and squirrels just about made me wet my pj's! Funny stuff, I tell you!!!

Kaci said...

Why is the city Des Moines...not pronounced with the s sound. Bugs me.

♥georgie♥ said...

LMAO@Do lesbian squirrels still eat nuts?

I would SO notice if you disapeered!

Stacie said...

LOL this had me laughing like crazy!! I so needed that laugh this morning!!

Jennifer Suarez said...

Why is that when we are moving something by ship it's cargo and moving something by car it's a shipment? Isn't that backwards?

Also we drive on a parkway but park on a driveway!

Stacie's Madness said...

hmmm, i wonder what is going on with you for you to be doing all this wondering.

Silent s goes for Illinois too, right? WTF? Drives me nuts though when people put the s on there. Illinoise.

Or, why do some hilljacks think that Jewel is said, Jewels. Or K-Mart, K-marts.

Why is there different dialect all over, when we are speaking the same language?

Why am I caring for a dog that I don't even want and will not be getting the divorce?

Why do I care what my soon to be ex is telling others negatively about me?

Why can't non-alcoholic beer TASTE like real beer?

Why does it rain everytime my son has a practice scheduled?

ok, shit, I'll stop there.

{{hugs}} for whatever is going on with you!

Betsy said...

I think the sign on the door would most definitely excuse the mess!

Oh, and surprisingly I don't have anything at the moment I am wondering about... I am lucky to remember what I have going day to day, let alone wonder about random things! LOL!

Patricia Rockwell said...

Des Moines and Illinois are nothing compared to how natives want you to pronounce "New Orleans" and "Louisville." Believe me, they leave out more than half the letters! I'm sure the first cow milker was some sex pervert who got a big surprise.

Patricia Rockwell said...

Oh, and what I'm wondering about is why when the minute you make a doctor appointment, the pain you have then immediately goes away?

Kathy B! said...

I would be devastated if you disappeared! You need to remove that one immediately - I don't like it! [stomps foot]

What do I wonder? I wonder how many seconds the kids will be in the car after school today efore I contemplate turning around and dropping them back off until tomorrow. And I wonder if I'd get in trouble for that. And I wonder if I'd care....

Soxy Deb said...

Of course we would notice if you disappeared. It might take us a week or twelve, but we would notice... :)


The one thing you don't have listed that I've always wondered about is:

Why does a dog bite at you when you blow in his face, but when you get him in the car, the first thing he does is put his head out the window? What the what?!?!

LoveMy2Dogs said...

These were great! I sat in a room by myself laughing. Hope you don't mind if I borrow your post. If so please let me know.


I wonder why is it that you can sit in the same room with the kiddos for hours and they don't want anything but the minute your butt hit the toilet seat they want everything. Is there a silent buzzer on the toilet seat that only kiddos can hear or what?

Chocolate Covered Daydreams said...

Why do flies rub their legs together? Are they saying grace before they land on your food?

So, why would you think about being disappearing???

Leah said...

I would notice if you disappeared. The sign on the door is a PERFECT idea, and a FABULOUS excuse for an unclean house.

HUGS for whatever still appears to be going on...

(PS Do you still want me doing that little project we discussed a few weeks ago?)

Julie said...

I would notice if you disapeared. Also, why, when we smell or taste something bad, do we offer it up to someone else simply to confirm it is bad?

overthetopaprons said...

mmmm. interesting list of questions.

Midwest Mommy said...

I wonder how you came up with all of these because they are hilarious! I have always wondered about the pain killer thing and the cow question just cracked me up.

Michelle said...

Oh you're going to have me up all night with these thoughts. My question has always been around colors... what I call blue you call blue when you see the same object because that's what you've been taught is blue. But is your version of blue the same as mine?

Lola said...

Noooooo, don't disappear. Let's do coffee again. Really. Email me.

Do lesbian squirrels still eat nuts? Well, if it helps you answer your conundrum, I love pistachios, peanuts and hazelnuts. Lol!

Jenni Jiggety said...

Chocolate is better...but don't tell my husband I said so. :-X

Also Bert and Ernie are welders, I think.

Elaine A. said...

Ok so now I'm SOOOOO going to have to use Purel after touching any money I have. Great. ; )

The squirrel one made me laugh out loud.

Kylie w Warszawie said...

I wonder about a lot of things, most of them morbid and depressing. I usually don't share them with others.

Aside from the lesbian squirrels and their eating habits, I would have to wonder if there were lesbian squirrels.

erotictoys said...

like the lesbian squirrels and nuts... wakekekekeke... thanks for the laugh... i kinda need it...

Stacie said...

I really enjoy reading your blog so I am awarding you 2 awards they will be on my blog shortly!

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